What I Know About God

He exists.

And I see him when you smile at me, when you burrow your head into my neck, and when all the expression leaves your face as you drift into peaceful sleep.

For a long time I backed away from God and religion. I knew I felt something was out there, but I didn't believe in Jesus. I needed proof. Most Christians I know said the Bible was their proof, but I just couldn't help but think that the Bible was written by men, and how on earth could we trust these men? For a long time I floundered in a sort of netherland, thinking that it really didn't matter anyway, because things were going to be what they were.

And then my son was born. And five days later, on a Sunday, I sat rocking him in his nursery after a feeding, looking at his content face, wondering if it was really just science that gave every mammal the special ability to produce the milk their babies needed to grow, when my own personal revelation hit me like a light bulb. Literally, it was as though a light were shining from God onto my little boy's face in front of me, and I whispered to myself "this is the proof I've been asking for". The most perfect gift, entrusted to me to take care of by a God that chose to give him to me even though I had denied Him. What an amazing moment in my life. I will forever be thankful to God for entrusting me with this life, and thankful to my beautiful son for reintroducing me to our Creator.